What I wish I said to my ex

October 28… It means nothing to you but to me it’s the day everything changed. I was running on no sleep I was anxious because of it and was having a shitty day. You barely talked to me all day and I was mad. You asked me what was wrong I answered nothing just not feeling well. My anxiety has been bad. You kept pushing me to give you more but I didn’t want to talk about. Then out of nowhere my messages weren’t going through. I was confused and thought it was my phone. But it wasn’t. I asked my my friend and found it you blocked me. That whole night I cried so hard I couldn’t breathe eat sleep nothing. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know why. You finally unblocked me that morning. You told me that you just didn’t want to deal with me that night and you just wanted to sleep. When all I did well I didn’t want to talk about why I wasn’t feeling good. Who the fuck does that. You blocked your girlfriend. The person you were supposed to protect, care, and be there for. You were my safe place and you ruin that in a second. You didn’t second guess it you just did it like You’ve been thinking about it for awhile. No hesitation. You kept saying it felt like we didn’t communicate because I couldn’t. After that I was so scared to tell you anything so I didn’t. You made me scared to bring anything up to you. You never talked about you wanted to act like it didn’t happen but it did and it ruined me. I had worked so hard to be opened about my anxiety and everything and now I’m scared and petrified to speak about it. You made me doubt myself and you don’t care. You said you loved me and was always going to be there but that’s a lie everything out of your mouth was just another lie that made you happy. I think the worst part is you’ll never know what you did to me. How much you hurt me. Because you don’t care. It’s only about you and your happiness. You never listen why start now. Just stay being a coward and teach your sons to never be like you because they wont get far in life. I pray the best for them and you,I just hope the next girl is smarter then me.

Good luck,

Allie (your happy ex)

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